*needle scratching across the record*

trouble was very easy to find.
but it really wasn't trouble.
you know how i justify though...

there were some bad decisions made, but it ended just as i wanted it to.
last night was the 3rd night that J has stayed over in recent weeks.

i met her up at the bowling alley, her league is on sun nights.
we had to go to the pub she works at to close up - a new girl was closing and doesn't have a key blahblah.
two and a half hours and 7 beers later, we were at my house.

i had to call down to the beach when i "left for work" this morning to wake them up.
we had been sitting out on the back porch all night and watched the sun come up.

the family stayed down at the beach until this afternoon.
just as the family did when the outlaws were in town.
and just as the family did some other time i can't remember.
heh...

we did manage a nap for a few hours after the phone call, woke up late and went for out lunch.
we ended up at her mom's (where she's living). her watching bad tv, and me asleep on the couch.

it's not always sexual. she doesn't want it like that.
but it's always very intimate.
and it's very comfortable.

she keeps telling me that whenever i'm ready to need her help, she would move in and help me with the girls. she's trying to find a new groove, something different than her current, deadend routine.

i'm not swooned by her words but i know i can depend on her when it comes time.

having her around more often has made me realize how much i've missed her.
it's been a long time.